Top Communication Skills » body language

Body language:- an Introduction to the Power Within…

Mike Noone — Thu, 12 Feb 2009 06:00:59 +0000

Body language is one of the hidden* *communication skills…**
Most times you’re not even aware of the hidden messages that you’re body language is sending, though you’ll probably notice the effect that it has on others.

So what is body language and why is it important ?

Well, basically body language is one of the ways that you communicate with others subtly. The reason that I say subtly is because most of the time the other person is not consciously aware of the message that you’re sending. It’s a bit like the little kid who has had his hands in the cookie jar. Mom says ” Have you been eating the chocolate cookies ? ” and the kid feeling guilty and a bit defensive says “No”

Mom knows better of course because the kid has got chocolate all around their mouth…
Body language is a bit like the chocolate around your mouth. It gives those who know what to look for, lots of clues about what you really meant when you said something. Or to be more precise what your body language says you really mean.

Interestingly enough, over 85 % of all communication is unconscious. that is to say it’s based on messages you’re getting that you’re not even consciously aware of. And did you know that your conscious mind can only handle around 70 bits of information per second. Mostly to do with important events and stimuli.

The unconscious mind, however, can deal with around 2,500,000- 3,000,0000 bits of information a second. I believe that this is where those gut instinct feelings come from.

It’s a reality check that can be used to determine whether or not you actually believe what someone has said. And it all happpens without you even realising why your not sure about someone and what they said.

I know that on the odd occasion that I have blatantly ignored my gut instinct I have often regretted it but that’s a story for another time…

To have *effective communication* everything should be congruent. That is to say, all your messages whether conscious or unconscious are all saying the same thing. Now most times you will be doing that and people do adjust to your communication style. They know that you really are a brilliant person. You really know your stuff but that maybe you’re not quite as confident as your words say you are and hey that’s not really a problem.

However, for those of you who have a lot invested in your **communication skills**body language becomes a critical factor. if you are a trainer, a coach, a teacher,a sales person or a parent it’s important that you get your message across in such a way that it inspires confidence and trust.

I believe that trust is the most important factor in building and maintaining relationships and when you are trusted people will respect you more…

So, what are the components of body language ?

Body language can be divided into several parts and include

*-your stance ( the way that you stand and position your body )

*- Your gestures

* – Your facial expression

: Image via Wikipedia

*- The way that you breathe

* unconscious gestures such as how fast you blink

*- and for the space cadets amongst you ….even your pulse rate…( a trained person can get in rapport with you just by mimmicking your pulse or your eye blink rate, by tapping their finger in time with it. this is pretty deep stuff and you can relax as it’s not part of mainstream teaching on the topic of body language.

There are also other factors such as verbal communication etc but as this is about body language we’ll leave that for another time. I will be posting on the topic of verbal communication skills at some point in the future.

One of the problems with body language is that you’re usually unaware of what you’re actually saying. What your body is telling others. So, how interesting would it be for you to discover more effective ways to use your body to get your message across ?

Imagine being able to create a great and lasting impression that gets you the results you really want and get the trust to be able to teach that class, get that sale, or have the harmony you seek in your family…

I will be posting a series of videos on body language and how to use it effectively in future posts…

Until then perhaps you could enjoy a fun activity. Just be aware of how people who are really great at communications skills use
their body to convey their message. You can just be curious about why they made that gesture with their hand or used that facial expression.
You will begin to be aware of what works and what doesn’t. Once you know what works for others you can model or copy those gestures until you are comfortable using them naturally…

This will take time and it’s important to remember to start with ONE thing at a time. That way you’ll become more profficient at that geture and it will become natural to others.

In my next post I am going to take you through an exercise which will demonstrate to you, beyond all doubt, how your body language affects how you feel emotionally and a super quick way to get out of being in a downer. It works every time…!

Body language:- an Introduction to the Power Within… is a post from: Top Communication Skills

Find Out How You Can Flirt With Girls And Never Get Turned Down

Anthony Santiago — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 11:21:45 +0000

Let me ask you a question…

Have you ever met a girl you liked, and despite your best efforts, you got stuck in the “lets just be friends” category?

Chances are it is because you did not flirt correctly with the woman.

Since flirting is a vital element in the process of attraction and you do not do it correctly, or even worse, not at all, you may be leaving your opportunity to be with the woman up to chance.

You can increase the attraction a woman finds in you by knowing how to flirt with her. And the secret is – flirting isn’t really as hard as many people think. In fact, it can be a lot of fun. The only time flirting doesn’t work is when it’s done WRONG.

See, there’s an art to flirting with a woman. Flirting is all about communicating in the girl, without coming right out and SAYING it.

Mixed signals are what this is. Your actions are communicating one thing, but your words are saying something completely different.

Here are some common mistakes most guys make when flirting with girls:

MISTAKE #1: They Are Way Too Obvious

Some men find it overwhelming when they feel attraction to a woman and then spit it all out at once letting her know how they feel. This type of presentation of information places the woman at a disadvantage of deciding what she feels for the man.

Keep in mind, by not laying the groundwork properly beforehand, you risk the chance of finding rejection from the woman.

MISTAKE #2: Not Being Obvious Enough!

On the flip side of that coin are the guys who communicate NO INTEREST AT ALL, yet in their minds they think that the girl should know how they are feeling. Then, when they make their move, the girl is surprised because up to this point, she had no idea the guy was interested in her!

MISTAKE #3: They Rely More On Words Than Actions

Although, flirting includes what you say and the way you say it, the most powerful performance comes from your non-verbal body language. The small simple things like raising an eyebrow, tilting your head to one side and that wicked little grin, that carries the most meaning in a seemingly innocent remark.

MISTAKE #4: Taking Things Too Seriously

Flirting is a lighthearted and fun practice, it is when serious romantic gestures begin that causes the sexual tension to break down.

You are doing something wrong when you or the woman is not having fun while you flirt. We could list more mistakes; however, this should provide you with a clear picture. Do you wonder what the right way to begin flirting is?

Use as much innuendo as you can while you are flirting, however the secret is in keeping it subtle.

Flirting is implication and it is fun and lighthearted.

After you begin flirting more often, you will begin to be more apparent concerning your interests, without ever crossing that line.

While doing this, you begin to notice the attraction that is building between you and the woman. Before much longer, all that harmless flirting turns into outright seduction. Now the real fun begins.

Visit Dating-To-Mating for all of your dating advice needs. Interested in knowing become an alpha male? See how the alpha male system can help you be the alpha male.

Technorati Tags: alpha male system, body language, culture society, dating, dating advice, double your dating, facebook dating, flirting, guy gets girl, men's interest, online dating, pickup, relationships, seduction

NLP Eye Accessing Cues- A Subtle Communication Skill

Mike Noone — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 00:50:59 +0000

NLP communication skills include using eye accessing cues.

Eye movements give you clues about which part of the brain someone uses to recall or create certain types of information.

There are ****** main types of internal representational systems, and each of these are associated with certain eye movements.

The representational systems are

Visual-Relates to input that is processed as a picture or a movie.
Auditory-Relates to input that is processed as sound
Kinaesthetic- Relates to input that is processed as a feeling in the body
Auditory digital- Relates to internal conversations that you have with yourself and may also involve you reading an internal script.

Now when I say processed what I mean is that the information can be received from outsid eof you AND also from inside of your own mind. This covers things such as memories , data and information.
By processing information this way it allows the human brain to sort classify and filter what type of information is being processed and allows us to make sense of our environment.

There are some people who will use more than one sensory system at once and this is known as synesthesia. In fact we all do this.

Sidebar:
Did you know that while seeing may be believing it is not neccesarily true. This is because around 80% of what you “See” actually comes from memories that you have stored in your brain already. One darn good reason to get your eyes checked regularly

Close sidebar:

If you look at the picture I have inserted below you will get an idea of which eye movements are used when accessing the various sensory systems.

PLEASE NOTE: Some people are reversed. ( Around 12 % of the population )What this means is that they do not use the same eye accesssing cues as the rest of the population. This is one reason that the police in New Zealand wrongly convicted some people. They were not taught about reversal.

Before you start to judge someone by their eye accessing cues you need to test to determine how their brain is organised by asking simple questions like the ones in the video.

NLP Eye Accessing Cues- A Subtle Communication Skill is a post from: Top Communication Skills

Technorati Tags: communication skills, eye accessing cues, nlp communication

Top Communication Skills » body language

Body language:- an Introduction to the Power Within…

Find Out How You Can Flirt With Girls And Never Get Turned Down

Related Blogs

NLP Eye Accessing Cues- A Subtle Communication Skill