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People sometimes ask me: “Tell me, what are interpersonal skills?”
I think one of the reasons they ask is that interpersonal skills are skills we use when we interact with people, and that there are so many different ways to interact that it’s difficult to define.
My take on this is that when our interaction with others gives us the result we want, and it gives the other person the result they want, we used our interpersonal skills successfully. I always aim at a win-win in any situation I’m in.
The thing is that we all have interpersonal skills. As we grow up and learn how to communicate with others, we learn ways to communicate and deal with people that are better than other ways.
Interpersonal skills have a lot to do with communication skills. That is because when we interact with others, we always communicate. These are skills we use every day. The question now is, are you using these skills in a way that creates more harmony between you and others?
Are you using these skills so that you and the other person get the results you want? I would call interpersonal skills relationship building skills. Because when we are with other people, we relate to them. And here, the question is: how well are you relating to other people?
There’s always room to improve your interpersonal skills, your communication skills, and your relationship building skills. And the better your interpersonal skills the more successful you are in your personal and professional life.
Do you know how to create that feeling of trust and understanding that we all crave from others?
Do know how to express your own needs so that the other person doesn’t feel attacked?
Do you know how to give emotional support to someone else, and in such a way that they can solve their own problem?
Do you know how to settle differences and disagreements so that nobody feels resentful about the outcome?
Interpersonal skills include assertiveness skills, listening skills, conflict resolution skills, problem solving skills. The most important skill though, in my opinion, is creating an atmosphere of mutual trust, respect and understanding. This skill alone allows you to get the other person to cooperate with you. It allows you to get what you want in such a way that the other person doesn’t feel resentful. Because when you do it right the other person gets what they want too. A real win-win…!
Technorati Tags: communication skills, effective communication, effective communication skills, good communication skills, improve communication skills, interpersonal, interpersonal communication skills, interpersonal skills, listening
Hi there,
I will be putting up a whole series of videos on this page that will look at the question…
How Well Do Your Communication Skills Work..?
And if they don’t why not ?
There is a lot of debate about this. It’s the old nature vs. nurture argument. From research that we’ve read here at Top Communication Skills the evidence is not only overwhelming but also fascinating.
Imagine That You Can Improve Your Results…just by making a slight shift in the way that you experience “stuff”. This will, of course, change the you think and react to everything that life throws at you.
AND…
If life is throwing stuff at you then why aren’t you either stepping to one side or ducking ?
We intend to answer all of these questions and more, here on this page.
Hang on tight. You’re in for an interesting….and eye opening, ride.
Technorati Tags: communication skills, communication skills videos, videos on communication skills
The quality of your interpersonal communication skills are a perfect reflection of your success in life. Your expertise in this area will decide how much money you have, where you live, the car you drive and the friends and contacts you have. There is a saying: “It’s not what you know, it’s who you know.” Who you know is decided by your ability to create effective relationships. Your ability to create effective relationships is determined by your interpersonal communication skills. I’d like to go through a few of the aspects of interpersonal skills that work.
Successful People have a Positive Outlook and a Can-Do Attitude to Life
Don’t be fooled into thinking these people were born with a silver spoon in their mouth. Of the 500 richest people in the United States of America, only two came from a wealthy background. The rest got where they are through hard work, determination and their ability to create the right relationships with the right people.
Every time you meet someone, whether you have met them before, or not, you are selling yourself. You want them to like you and to cooperate with you, and in most cases you want to feel the same way about them.
Since the beginning of time, when we first climbed down from the trees on the plains of Africa, the whole of humanity’s progress has been based on cooperation. Without someone else covering our back when out hunting; without the power of the group to tend the first crops or build the first cities, we would be eating bamboo shoots and living in the jungle.
Cooperative communication and relationships is the thing that distinguishes humanity from the other animals. The development of language allows us to dream and visualize and to communicate that dream to others so that all of the tribe can work together. We are now all part of the same global tribe. The Internet and instant communication now makes it possible to share your thoughts and dreams with another person on the opposite side of the planet, in a matter of seconds.
At this point in history it it more important than ever to have first class interpersonal communication skills. Because of the constant bombardment from the media, it is difficult to stand out against the background noise. Only through having effective interpersonal communication skills and systems can you hope to ever be more than “yeah, me too”. This is one of the other things that the super successful have mastered. They have learned how to build good cooperative relationships with others, in just the same way that our ancient forbearers did. They have learned to harness the power of the masses through personality, charisma and leadership. With these three qualities you could drop them in the middle of the desert or a jungle and they would succeed.
At the root of every success story is the ability to create teams, relationships and win-win situations. The sooner you start to practice and master these skills, the quicker your success and satisfaction in life will come.
Technorati Tags: communication skills, communication skills training, interpersonal communication skills
You’re probably wondering what you can do to improve your communication skills. One of the most important things to decide on first is the reason that you want to improve your communication skills.
There are many great reasons to improve communication skills, and they include to have better relationships with family, colleagues, neighbors and friends. It may be that you want to improve your position in your job or your business. It may be for that all important interview so that you get the job you really want and know that you deserve. Another reason may be to get that hot date with the object of your affections.
Once you’ve established your reason, let’s look at the different methods you can use to improve communication skills.
Flying Solo
You can buy books, DVDs, CDs and spend many hours trying to work out the areas where you can get better interpersonal skills. This is a great starting point, as you will learn some basic techniques and strategies.
Getting a Coach
Having your own personal coach to help you to get better communication skills is probably the most effective method, however it’s also the most expensive one. If you have lots of money and time, then this is the route for you. A good communication skills coach will give you tasks to do between appointments and will also check to ensure that you have completed them and that you are competent with the skills. Ideally, a coach will also structure things in a way that each session builds on what you learned in the previous session.
Group Training
There are many excellent group trainings that are available. One that I have used and recommend is Transforming Communication. This is a comprehensive 4 day off-line course that teaches you everything you need to know if you wish to improve communication skills. The downside of this course is that you will have to travel to the venue, pay for travel costs, hotels and local transport. You will also probably have to give up personal time or vacation time so you can attend.
Online Training
There are numerous online communication skills training and I would invite you to check all them out by doing a search on Google using the keyword term “online communication skills training”.
The Benefits of Online Communication Skills Training
Good trainings will give you instant access to the course material. You’ll also get a downloadable workbook you can use in your own time. The course will be clearly and logically structured and each lesson will build on the previous one in just such a way that you will progressively improve communication skills. It will include training material on who actually has the problem, conflict resolution, rapport skills, listening skills, leading and pacing and consulting.
Other advantages of online training include still being able to spend time with your family and friends (you can even invite them to take part in the training with you so everyone benefits). You don’t have to give up valuable vacation time. You save on travel and hotel costs. Your income, job, or business is not affected.
All these different ways to improve communication skills are all equally valid. The method you choose is dependant on your needs, your ambitions, the time you’ve got available and the amount you think you’re worth.
Technorati Tags: communication skills, communication skills training, improve communication skills, transforming communication
When asked “What’s the importance of communication?”, I usually reply, “What’s the importance of your friends, your family and your colleagues?” Communication is the glue that holds society together.
I’d like you to imagine living in a world where you could not convey your ideas or thoughts to another person. Imagine being in a place of great beauty, that takes your breath away, and not being able to share it. Imagine, if you will, a time of great need, of crisis, where nobody had the power to guide or be guided to find a solution.
Those who overlook the importance of communication and their own ability to take control of their lives, are usually found at the bottom of the economic pile.
Communication skills and the human mind are the two most powerful tools we have at our disposal. We can choose to use them for good or for evil. It’s my belief that the majority of people do things for the good of many. Every action has the highest intention at its root.
Given that communication skills hold the fabric of your world together, does it not make sense to enhance your skill level so that your world becomes more secure. That your world becomes safer for your family, your friends and others that you love. As I’ve said in other articles on this site, humanity’s progress and success has been entirely dependent on our ability to cooperate and work together for the common good.
Our ability to work together and cooperate is, in its turn, entirely dependent on our ability to clearly communicate problems, challenges, and solutions that we can achieve together. And that is the importance of communication.
Technorati Tags: communication skills, importance of communication
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